and i'm not talking about the hormones that make me as horny as a sex-crazed teenager. i actually like those ones. quite a lot in fact. the hormones that i'm hating on would be the ones who like to become totally unstable for about three or four days every month, which in turn makes me totally unstable for about three or four days every month. and today is one of those days. usually i'm pretty normal (well, in a hormones being balanced kind of way at least), and a large part of that is thanks to the miracles of modern birth control pills. and luckily with the one i'm on, i don't need to be off them for a full week. but for those few days when i'm supposed to take the fake pills my hormone levels get way off balance. and since i'm prone to depression, it's very, very easy for me to slip into a really, really dark place. and i cry stupidly easily. and things that on a normal day i wouldn't even waste two seconds thinking about will keep me up all night. and i break out like a thirteen year old. so right now i'm fight a war with my brain, trying to convince it that it really needs to stay in a happy place. and there is another war with my skin trying to convince it that i am many years past puberty and this acne thing is getting old. and then there is a final war with the fucking back cramps that won't go away. too bad i spent all my drinking money (plus a lot of his drinking money) last night. i could really go for a cocktail right about now. but since that isn't going to happen, i think i'll go hide under the covers. the fail ninja has been doing that most of the day and it seems to be working out pretty well for her.
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