fail ninja

so my cat fancies herself a ninja.  problem is, she's not a sly as she thinks she is.  and she wears a bell on her collar.  and about 1/3 of her is white.  so yeah, she's a fail ninja.  but that doesn't stop her from trying.  she likes act all sneaky and steal random things of mine.  especially hair ties.  i'm pretty sure there is a stock pile of those under my bed since they seem to go missing a lot.  she also tries to hide behind things that she is much bigger than.  one of the most common places to see her before what she thinks is a well thought out assault on my slippers would be crouched down behind  my converse.  she also thinks it very clever to try and eat things she is not supposed to when i'm not looking.  i'm pretty sure that she forgets that she has a bell on and i can hear it when she jumps onto the counter.  the best is when she doesn't hear my come down the stairs.  she thinks she is getting away with being a bad kitty.  the look of shock on her face when i come up behind her is priceless. 

the other reason she fails as a ninja is that she is very easily distracted and/or bribed.  all i need to do to divert her attention from her covert operations is to shake the treat jar or get out the laser pointer.  last time i checked, ninjas were not supposed to be able to be corrupted and bribed.  neither were they allowed to be distracted by a small red light.