Sunday, October 31, 2010

happy halloween!

happy halloween everyone!  the thought of all the free candy i'm missing out on because society has deemed me far too old to trick-or-treat makes me a little sad.  does any one happen to have a small child that i could borrow?  just for tonight, i'll promise to give it back.  i just want to get the free candy and not look creepy.  and for anyone out there still partying tonight, be safe.  don't wear 4" heels.  


Saturday, October 30, 2010

to make all you sick people happy

so my friends keep asking for pics of my ankle.  to this i say you all suck, but since i still luv you, i'm caving in.  took this after i had to take the bandage off for a shower.  the bruising has started to go away, but it's still pretty swollen, and the swelling has actually spread to the top of the foot now also, and i still can't walk on it.  i hope you'll all happy now.


and i would like to add that all those years of using polo wraps on horses has made me pretty damn spiffy with an ace bandage.

‎4" heels + street curbs + rain + dark = one really fucked up ankle

so like my post from yesterday was pointing at, i had a halloween party to go to last night.  so did like 70 other people who wanted to park on the same street.  so i parked on the next street over. didn't really think much of it, figured a little walk is never a bad thing.  i ended up being slightly wrong on that this time. when i went to step up onto the curb, my heel caught on either the curb or the street.  i totally tripped and fell to my knees.  probably would have landed a lot better if i hadn't been trying to protect the six pack i was holding.  anyway, i got up, limped around a little, and figured i would just walk it off.  got to the party and sat on the couch until it felt better.  great i thought, everything is ok now since it doesn't hurt anymore.  so i got up and did the party thing.  toward the end of the night, it started to hurt again, so i sat down for a while.  it was feeling ok by the time i decided to go home.  walked to the car with no problems.  and then i got home.  once i took off my boots i realized that the only reason that it had been feeling ok was because my boots are skin tight and had been holding pressure on it and not letting it swell.  once the boots were off, it started swelling.  and bruising.  and now i can't even put weight on it, so i've been hopping around on one foot to get to different parts of my apartment.  since i'm pretty nonfunctional right now, dani is being awesome and going to the store to get me some meds and a wrap.  at least it's no longer making the popping sounds that it was last night.  i'm hoping i can fix it myself today, and if it's not improving by tomorrow when i wake up i'll go to a doctor.  le sigh.  at least i looked good last night.



Friday, October 29, 2010

omg! another costume!

so, i love halloween.  i pretty much love any excuse to wear a costume.  and since i got to wear one last weekend, and get to wear a different one tonight, i'm totally stoked.  i am not, as some people thought, re-wearing the blood elf costume.  partly because the ears got a little messed up on the way home, and partly because that's just the way i roll.  different event, different costume.  tonight, i'm going as a pirate.  i was considering skanky pirate, but i'm not really feeling that, so i'm going for awesome pirate.  i have a pretty sweet, girly type pirate hat that i'm going to wear.  i plan on wearing black pants with my black hooker boots (4" heels, they're awesome).  i'm also going to be wearing my white ren faire shirt with my leather gauntlets.  i have 2 options as to what to wear over the shirt, and i haven't decided which i want yet.  i'm either going to tie a red sash just under the bust line, or wear my corset top from last weekend over it.  i'll have to try them both on and see what looks best.  as for accessories, i will be using my black leather pouch again, along with my pewter tankard and flogger.  i'm expecting to look pretty kick ass.  not sure if i'll be able to get any pics, but i'll be sure to share them if i do.  have i mentioned how much i love costumes?

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

feeling a little emo

so life can sneak up on you in funny little ways.  like tomorrow is making me feel way more emotional than i would have ever expected it to.  tomorrow will be different for me than it has been for the last six years, and for some reason it's a little unnerving.  the event itself is unimportant, since that's not really where the issue lies.   it's just forcing me to realize how much things have changed this year, some for the better, some for the worse.  it's always just a little surreal when something unimportant and insignificant causes you to evaluate a large portion of your life.  while i know that none of it can be changed, and i don't really regret most of it, it's just weird to see how things you did years ago could have had entirely different outcomes.  but that's just the way it is.  can't do anything about it now, so i don't want to waste to much of my rambling on it.  i'll be back to my usual sarcastic, witty self by friday.  until then, enjoy this picture of a pretty flower

credit: me!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

epic loot


the loot

guess what?  another post about blizzcon!  this time about the swag. i was going to try and write about something unrelated to blizzcon so that the non gamers could have something to enjoy, but i got writer's block when i tried that.  and since it's my blog, y'all just have to deal with it. (yes, i know that was redneck.  whatever)  anyway, i'm going to talk about the blizzcon goodie bag, the stuff i bought, and how this caused me to totally rearrange my apartment.

deathy
first off, the swag bag that every one gets when you pick up your badge.  the less exciting items included some coupons for different vendors at the convention, and a trial version of starcraft II.  since i don't play and have no intention of starting, just let me know if you want this and i'll see what i can do.  now for the things that peaked my interest: deathy and dethling.  deathy is the in-game pet murloc made to look like deathwing from cataclysm.  if you want to make a super pissed off dragon look adorable, this is the way to do it.  also, i'm a pretty avid vanity pet collector in-game, so this is right up my ally.  dethling, on the other hand, is a tangible item.   he's a miniature version of deathwing.  and this may just be because i'm a little weird, but i think he's adorable as well.  he's hand cast in polystone, hand painted, and only available to people who attended blizzcon this year.  and he is awesome.  he is currently guarding my jewelry boxes.  nothing is going to steal my fake precious gemstones and crazy cool earrings while he's on watch.  the one thing that worries me is the cat.
dethling
while he may look menacing, he's defenseless against her and her stupid need to try and eat everything that i don't want her to.  and considering that he will never be available for retail sale, i wouldn't have an easy time replacing him.  she tried to chew on one of his wings last night when i was moving things around, and i swear she almost lost one of her nine lives over it.


official shirt
which brings me to the part about rearranging my apartment.  part of it was because i wanted dethling to be on a taller bookshelf so that said cat couldn't eat him.  but the bigger part was because i needed somewhere to hang my blizzcon poster.  i decided that it would look really awesome over my bed, with my convention pass hanging next to it.  and it really does.  only problem was that there was already stuff hanging above my bed.  no problem, i'll just move it to the other side of the room.  well, there's a picture there.  ok, i'll just move it to the kitchen and move the white board over a little.  well now the bookshelf at the top of the stairs is blocking the pictures there, so i'll move it next to my desk.  now it looks really blank in that spot.  i'll put the bookshelf from downstairs there since it's shorter.  and i'll move all my breyer horses there since it will match the pictures on the wall behind it.  well now all the black and white pictures on the wall going up the stairs don't match all the color at the top of the stairs, so i'll switch them with the color prints in the living room.  and the egypt picture doesn't match the black and white ones, so it can go upstairs.  and since i moved the bookshelf from downstairs to upstairs, i need to pull out the folding bookshelf again so i have something to put movies and you know, books, on to.  so yeah, one poster caused a whole night of moving things.  but it was totally worth it.  i also got the official t-shirt, but it was slightly easier to find a place to put that.

Monday, October 25, 2010

blizzcon, the costume edition

so as promised, i have my costume and dance contest post.  the dance contest might be something else i enter next time.  you pretty much need to emulate the dance of one of the races in game.  the winner did the dwarf male dance.  this guy did not look like he was going to be able to bust this out at all.  you can see the video below.  during the contest, one guy did injure his leg.  he was doing the undead male dance, and landed weird from a jump.  it looked like he rolled his ankle.  the host said the leg was broken (not too sure since he could still move it some) and blizzcon workers needed to carry him off stage.



the costume contest was really cool, with some amazing costumes that you will sadly need to look up here (select the costume contest gallery) because the main hall was far too dark for me to get any good pictures, and we had to sit so far back that we had to watch most of it on the big screens.  i was lucky enough to get pictures of some of the contestants on the convention floor, but seeing as how some of them could hardly walk in their costumes, not all of them were on the main floor.  at least i have a better idea of what i need to pull off next year if i want to enter the contest.  better start working on it now. sadly not all the pictures i took were the best quality.  below are some of the better pictures that i was able to take, as well as a little explanation about them.  also, i am not including any of the blizzard models in the post.  i'll show them in a later post, but i want to showcase the non pros first.

these are witch doctors from diablo.  from a distance i thought they were trolls, but could tell they were something else once i got closer.  both are in full body paint.
 the grayish one is a spirit healer from WoW.  when you die in game, you go to a graveyard.  you have the option of running back to your body, or asking the spirit healer to resurrect you, which brings you to life instantly but cause damage to your armor and temporarily lowers your stats.  the person next to her is a blood elf warlock in the dreadmist armor set.
 this is a female version of illidan.  illidan is a big, bad, pissed off demon and is the main bad guy in the WoW expansion "the burning crusade."  along with his legion of demons, he pretty much wants everyone dead.
 the girl on the left is lady sylvanas windrunner.  she is the leader of the forsaken (or undead).  she used to be a high elf, was killed by the lich king, broke free from his control, refound her body, and came back in this form.  the girl on the right is jaina proudmoore, leader of the human city of theramore isle.  when we were walking by these girls, brian's remark was "it doesn't get much better than this."
 i saw her while i was in line for the blizzard store.  she's a really cute version of a succubus.  she's much more colorful and girly than the in game version, but she also paid a lot of attention to details.  i couldn't get a picture that included her feet because of where i was, but she had made shoe covers that looked like hooves and her legs were painted as well.
 the other alex tells me that this girl is a female version of a ghost from starcraft.  as he put it "not a scary ghost, that's just a class you can play."  she was being very patient with the guy who was taking pictures of her at the same time.  i think he took about 5 different shots and got really close to her face.  she was nice about it and just kept posing.
 this is a night elf druid.  i wish that a still picture could have captured her shoulder armor better.  it had working lights and everything to make it look like the in game armor.
 a tauren in casual clothing.  another cute costume, but i don't think it was intentional this time.  not sure if this was a guy or a girl, but s/he just reminded me of a giant stuffed animal that you just really want to hug.
 this costume is hilarious to anyone who plays WoW.  she is a mage.  mages have a spell called polymorph, but players just refer to it as sheeping someone, because that's basically what the spell does.  it's considered a crowd control spell, since who ever you turn into a sheep can't do anything for 30 seconds, giving you time to kill something else, or run away.  she introduced her sheep as her pet troll.
 warrior in one of the armor sets.  i don't remember which tier they said it was.  the helmet had glowing lights on it.  the shoulders were really big, and a guy had to walk out in front of him to make sure there was room for him to get by.
 pandaren monk.  melanie says it looks like kung fu panda.  pretty much the same concept, except that this one brews alcohol.
 the girl in front is a troll shaman.  behind her is the thunder bluff (one of the capitol cities in WoW) version of a mail box.
 i'm pretty sure that this guy is a priest.  there's an off chance he's a mage, but i'm like 90% sure he's a priest.
 blood elf paladin.  i almost knocked over a display stand trying to get to her to take a picture.  the book she's holding lights up as well.
 another blood elf paladin, but with awesome eyes.  i wish i had noticed them sooner so i could have asked her what kind of contacts she used for it.  i really wanted the same effect for my eyes, but in blue.
 there are a few different things that this guy could be, so i'm not 100 % on this, but i think he's a warrior.  either way, he had an awesome costume.  the entire thing was made out of leather.
 the only couple that i saw dressed up together.  they're both night elves, you just can't see his ears from this angle.  and speaking of couples, i saw three marriage proposals this weekend.  one was during the actual costume contest up on stage, the other two happened on the frozen throne photo op, one on friday, one on saturday.  i'm pretty sure that if i had a guy propose to me while at blizzcon, my inner geek wouldn't be able to contain herself.
 moonkin.  kinda hard to explain this one if you don't play.  the short version is that certain druids can learn an ability that allows them to take this form.  the green orb she was holding also lit up.
 two female trolls.  these girls were adorable.  they were really nice and posed with a ton of the guys there who kept asking for pics.  they would also do a cute little dance if you were taking video.  they had really cool eyes as well.
 female orc.  this costume made me laugh also.  it's kind of hard to tell, but she's holding a fishing pole.  she has a severed arm attached to her bag.  this is because one of the quests in game asks you to find the fish that ate this guys' arm.
 simple version of a rogue, but i love how into his character he was.
 the other alex also told me that this is the male version of the ghost class from starcraft.  this guy was super patient with me.  my camera was messing up and it took me a while to get the picture, but he just posed until i got it working again.
 the girl on the left was the winner of the costume contest.  she's a female monk from diablo.  there was a lot of leather on her costume, and it was all hand tooled.  the girl on the right is a blood elf mage.
 blood elf death night.  pretty much the milf version of my costume.  this lady was really nice, and was talking to me for a while after the picture.  she said it took her about a year to finish her costume.
 i know this is from starcraft, and the other alex told me what is was, but i can't remember.  all i know is that it looked really cool, and the guy could barley see because of his awesome mask.
 kind of a more earthy, natural version of a night elf.  sort of reminded me of an elf version of pocahontas.  as you can see by the look on the guy's face behind here, this is why guys love conventions.
 i sadly have no idea what this girl is.  neither does the other alex.  because of that, we conclude that she must be from diablo.  but her costume was just too pretty to not post.


Sunday, October 24, 2010

blizzcon!

me in my full costume on the frozen throne
so i just had probably the most awesome weekend ever.  blizzcon was absolutely amazing.  i had a lot of people wanting to take my picture.  a few people wanted pictures with me.  one guy even asked if he could touch my ears.  i was also interviewed by a gaming website (i'll post the link later if it gets put up) and i was on a tv spot for direct tv's live cover of the event, which also showed at the closing ceremony.  there are a few videos of the event of youtube, but i'm waiting for one that's not so shaky to post here. 

so many cool things happened that i'm not sure how i'm going to be able to get it all in here.  even though i have seen then cinematic clip for cataclysm about 20 times before blizzcon, i just about had a nerd-gasm when they played it on the big screen with crazy light and sound effects.  i'm insanely stoked that you will be able to pre-download cataclysm and start playing as soon as they turn the servers on december 7.  even though i don't play diablo, the video to introduce the demon hunter class was awesome.  there were a ton of amazing panels.  they covered everything from lore, to how they make the game, to the music in game, and all kinds of q&a sessions.  the artist stage had real blizzard artists drawing live and answering questions.  there was a game show type stage where you could win prizes by answering questions about lore.  there were pro gamer competitions, and tons of demo games.  the costume and dance contest were really cool.  i'll be writing more about those tomorrow, along with posting some of the costume pics i got on the convention floor (sadly the lighting in the contest hall did not allow me to get any pictures).  i was able to buy some cool stuff, and the swag bag was pretty awesome also.  and tenacious d played the closing concert.  it was a pretty epic weekend.  now i need to go unwind, and i'll update more tomorrow.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

how to make a blood elf, part 2

for part 1, click here


so we're leaving for blizzcon today.  and in honor of that, i wanted to post an update on my costume.  first and most importantly, the ears.  they are finally finished.  i forgot to take pics while i was doing the fine tuning, but it's pretty simple to figure out. first, i cleaned off as much black marker as i could.  windex works really well for this.  after that, i used some more of the liquid latex to build up the ridges a little better.  after that dried and i was happy with the look, i just used scissors to trim the edges and smooth the lines out.  an xacto blade would probably work better for this, so if you have one use that instead.  doesn't matter too much for the extension part, but it helps to be more accurate for the part that actually attaches to your ear.  after all this, just use makeup to color match.  mine aren't exactly the same as my skin tone, but it's as close as i could get without spending a lot of money on costume makeup.  you'll notice in the pic that there's some white stuff on my ear.  this is just excessive adhesive.  it dies clear, but i'm in the process of packing for blizzcon and didn't have time to let it dry before i took the pic.  as a side note to anyone with long hair, you'll notice i have a headband on.  this is not for any fashion reason.  this is because all of your hair will stick to your ear before you have a chance to attach the extension.  trust me on this one.

if you know anything about blood elves, you will know that they have very, very long eyebrows.  there are several ways to do this, depending on the length you want.  since i'm already having to work my hood around my ears, i didn't want to have to worry about too much length on the eyebrows, so i made a creative decision to keep mine a little shorter.  to do this, i got eyelash extensions and glued them to my eyebrows.  since the extensions are jet black, i used an eyebrow pencil to darken my brows so that it blends in better.  you can also see that i'm using a shimmer white liquid eyeshadow.  i really wanted to use costume contacts to get glowing blue eye look of a death knight, but since i wear real contacts and actually want to see what's going on around me, this wasn't really a good option.


use extensions that are for tips only, not full lashes




 this part has more to do with being a death knight than a blood elf, but i figured i would go into some of my costume accessories.  first up is the runeblade.  i actually got extremely lucky with this one.  one $8 costume sword and a neon blue paint pen later, i was set.  and the sword that i got already had runes on the blade part, so i'll i had to do was paint.  i also picked up a few stryofoam skulls at the halloween store.  one is going on the black cord that i'm using for a belt, the other is going on the chain that holds my cloak on.  i used the same paint pen that i used on the blade to fill in the sockets on the skulls to give them the same glowing blue effect.  i was planning on getting some leather strips to tie around my upper arms, but that ended up being a little more expensive than i wanted.  i found that thick black ribbon has the same effect i was going for.  i'm also going to be wearing black leather bracers that i already had, and using a black leather pouch in place of a purse.


i'll post pics of the finished costume when i get home on sunday, along with a ton of other pics through out next week.  until then, i'm off to blizzcon bitches!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

twinkle, twinkle, little star

so that's probably the most advanced thing i can play on my guitar right now.  considering i'm teaching myself how to play, i'd say that's not too shabby.  my biggest problem with learning new skills is that i am extremely impatient about it.  i really hate all the tedious little details.  i would love to just skip over all that and dive right into the cool stuff.  i want to be able to sit down, bust out the guitar, and start playing "californication."  at least i already know how to read music, so that helps.  but repeating the same 2 cords over and over and over gets old.  like really old.  too bad i'm not a prodigy, that would make things way easier, but i guess i'm a little old for that anyway.  le sigh.  it's also really hard to motivate myself to practice when i can only play like 3 songs.  so if any one know a really cool, really simple song, kindly pass it my way.  until then my neighbors are stuck listening to "o when the saints" and "michael row your boat ashore."  oh well.  at least i look good playing it.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

my, what big ears you have

so we do ear cropping at my work.  mostly dobermans.  we're the only clinic within 200 miles that does it, so we kinda see a lot of them.  and before anyone gets bitchy about it, we do a really good job, we do it humanly with with pain management, and it's way better for them to come to us and have it done right that to try it at home with a razor blade.  that being said, most of the time i think the dogs look adorable with the floppy ears.  while i can see why this might not make the most imposing looking guard dog, there's nothing wrong with a family dog looking all cute and cuddly.  so usually i'm a little bummed when the owners decided to go through with it.  that was not the case this week.  we had a dog come in who has probably some of the silliest looking ears i have ever seen in my life.  i have honestly never once seen a dog like this before.  he kind of reminds me of the song "do your ears hang low."  this was probably the first time i was relieved that the owners opted for ear cropping.  at least he'll look like a real dog now.

 

Monday, October 18, 2010

porcupine sex!

so alex got upset that the post i mentioned him in had to bring into question sexual preferences.  he also didn't like how i referred to hanging out with him as a sometime curse.  i did not mean any of this in a bad way at all, but alex, just because i luv you so, and i want you to be happy and still go to class on thursday nights so i don't have to go alone, i decided to write a new post for you.  and since you are already taking me out in like 5 different conspiracy theories (that i know about), i figure i should add a legitimate reason for me to be on your "going down with you" list.  and this is also probably a good lesson for everyone else as well.  when talking to a member of the opposite sex that you happen to fancy, there are certain subjects that should never, ever, ever be brought up.  somewhere near the top of this list should be porcupine sex.  i mean, i understand how the logistics of it can be a legitimate scientific curiosity.  but i'm also an animal science major, i went to school for weird animal things.  so i don't think the other person will quite get it as well as i do.  best just not touch that subject at all.  ever.  this should probably be something, that if you absolutely have to bring it up, you wait until after your married, when it's really, really difficult for them to leave you for being a little weird.  but not before then.  and even that's pushing it.



also, what if you do bring it up before then and the person agrees with you on how interesting the predicament of the porcupine love life is?  now things are just going to get awkward from there on out.  you will wonder why they care so much, are they doing it just to agree with you so that you like them better, or do they love porcupines more than you?  and can you really handle the truth on a question like that?

Sunday, October 17, 2010

the WoW nerd in me is squealing like a little girl

remember how i said i'm going to be geeking out until after blizzcon?  this right here?  this is exactly what i'm talking about.  

so blizzcon is only days away.  5 days to be exact.  i need to put some finishing touches on my costume, but it's almost done.  i won't be wining any awards with it this year, but it should still be fun to dress up.  and i can't wait to see all the other costumes there.  the other alex is going to have to explain the starcraft ones to me, and we might be lost on the diablo ones since no one in the group plays, but it should still be awesome.  and i get a cute little in game pet.  and there's going to to be so many cool things to see.  and contests to watch.  and omg there's going to be gamer shopping! (extended girly squeal)(passes out from loosing air)(wakes up 5 minutes later).

ok, i'm good now.  the other exciting WoW thing of the day is that the cinematic trailer for the cataclysm expansion was released today. it's pretty awesome.  check it out.  how can you not want to play after watching it?



(more squealing)(falls out of chair) i'm ok.  i can control myself, really i can.  just need to hold it together until friday.  then there's no telling what i'll do.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

i picked the wrong month to quit

so i had to take a month off playing WoW because i couldn't pay the subscription fee.  just started up again today, and holly hell they made a lot of changes to hunters.  apparently i no longer have mana, i have focus.  what am i, a fucking rogue?*  this totally messes up a lot of things i have in my bank now.  also the arrows i used to make and could sell for a decent amount of gold are now worthless.  i had to redo both of my talent trees, which means i have to redo both sets of hotkeys.  i hate this.  i feel like such a n00b when i have to redo everything.  errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. and i get to so it all over again with my death knight.  i should have know better than to take a month off with a new expansion coming soon.  guess i know what i'll be doing the rest of the day now.  if i wasn't so close to loremaster i might consider rerolling.   /end rant

*i know rogues have energy, not focus, but whatever.  rogues suck anyway.

Friday, October 15, 2010

ode to a bean burrito

ok, so i'm not really going to write a poem about a burrito....yet.  but basically, it's a simple joy that i very rarely get to indulge in anymore.  this would be because even though i'm a college graduate, i still only have a job that just barely covers the cost of living for the town i'm in, and sadly no place else i've applied at has even called for an interview.  i already live in the cheapest place in town that is not student housing.  i no longer have cable since i can't afford it.  i have a car that i am trying really hard to convince to not fall apart since it's paid off.  i usually end up living on peanut butter and rice (not mixed together, that would be gross)  for about week each month.  so this makes pay days the most awesome thing i could possibly experience.  after i allocate my money to all the bills and necessities (like normal food), i can see what i have left for play time.  this pay check i have about $100, and i'm probably going to blow half of it this weekend and the rest at blizzcon.  tonight i spent $8 on mexican food.  there is a place by my house that has the most amazing spanish rice ever, and the burritos are pretty kick ass.  $7 will be going to hookah later, which is probably the best $7 i'm going to be spending all week.  $21 went to a handle of pre made pomegranate martini mix, which i am currently sipping away at.  hey, it's after 5:00, i'm allowed to.  it's been kind of a shitty week, so i plan on going through about half the bottle tonight, if not more.  i might be a chick, but i can out drink everyone i know except for jeff, and he has said that i'm the only person he knows that can keep up with him.  i'm sure there will be more stories on this subject at a later day.

so as it stands, i get to have fun about once a month.  my next check will go almost entirely to rent, so i need to live it up when i can.  looking back at my bank statement, excluding the two week drinks i got last sunday, i have not had a bar tab since july.  my mother tells me this is a good things.  i disagree.  this will also be the first night i have been able to go hookah since the beginning of august.  lots of lost time to make up for here.  this could be shaping up to be a pretty good night.  and to anyone unfortunate enough to have their number stored in my phone, i apologize in advance.  and if any of you put me on texts from last night, will you at least let me know so i can link to it?

Thursday, October 14, 2010

shout out to the boys

 so the boys over at drewlyon.com  posted a new video.  this is what inspired me to write about the car story the other day.  it makes me laugh every time i watch it.  you can check it out below, but check out the site as well.  also, you can't access the photo page from the main site, but matt writes that section, so make him happy and give it a look.  and a happy matt is more fun for me to be around.  so really, you'll be making me happy by extension. and if i'm happy, i'll write better.  which means better blog posts.  which means a happier you.  so do you self a favor, and visit the site.


necessity is the mother of invention

so last month the weather here decided to be bi polar.  one week it was over 100 degrees outside, the next week it was freezing cold.  it was also doing the wonderful thing where it was it was blistering hot during the day and near arctic temperatures at night.  it was on one of these days that dani wanted to go to the barn when i got off work.  seeing how it was still nice and hot when we started the drive out, we were both just wearing t-shirts and didn't bother with bringing jackets.  once we got there, the weather had taken a drastic change.  it was now very windy and very cold.  whatever, i'll just ride my horse bareback and steal some of his body heat and it will be fine.

well, my horse was lame, so so much for that plan.  dani and i have our horses on different sides of the barn, so she went off to get her horse ready while i was taking care of mine.  since i couldn't ride, i just brushed him out and mixed together his grain for the night.  after he was happily munching away at his diner, i walked over to the arena where dani was riding.  "so prince is lame so i can't ride toda.........are you wearing a cooler?"  what i had thought to be a red sweatshirt that she had found at the barn turned out to indeed be her horse's cooler.  she had wrapped it around herself like a cocoon.  her response?  "shut up, it's warm."  "dude, you look like you're wearing a snuggie." and thus, the invention of the cooler snuggie was born.  this image will forever be burned into my memory as one of the funniest things i have ever seen.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

hell hath no fury

this is the actual car, sadly we had no after pictures
don't ever piss off a girl.  we have friends who will always take our side and can make your life miserable.  case and point, halloween night 2004.  melanie had come home earlier that week, really upset.  "that guy is such an asshole."  that was all i needed to hear to know that revenge was needed.  "saran wrap" was my answer.  a quick trip to the store, and we were now the proud owners of 300' of saran wrap.  we decided to make our move on halloween.  i put on my black hoodie, and we waited until the cover of darkness.   the only thing we were missing was war paint.  we stealthy made it out of the dorm hall.  we had to be extra sly because he lived on the first floor.   once outside, we were able to relax some.  an eerier layer of fog had started to form in the parking lot.  while some might have balked at being outside on halloween in this weather, we basked in it.  it was the perfect cover for what needed to be done.  "where'd he park at?" "it's over here."  we crept up to the 2 door blue car with the stupid over sized spoiler  and observed our surroundings.  the car was not in the most favorable position for what had to be done.  it was in the middle of the lot, with several cars around who's owners could appear at anytime.  we were going to have to using all of our cunning to pull this one off without being caught.  

once we felt secure enough, we went to work.  out came the saran wrap.  the first victim was the doors.  there was no way in hell we were going to make this easy on him.  i took up post on the driver side, melanie on the passenger.  it took a few tries to perfect our technique, but we did it.  we were soon deftly wrapping the sides of the car, tossing the saran wrap roll over the top, then underneath.  suddenly we saw head lights.  "shit.  it's campus police.  hide!"  hoodie over the head, duck down between the rows of cars, and pray the fog holds.  slowly the patrol car rolled by.  this was the first time we saw the cops, but it was not the last.  we had to wait until they left the parking lot before we could start up again.  we knew we would have to be on our guard until the deed was finished.  this scene repeated itself three times, slowing our progress.  but we were determined.  we were out for blood.

once we had used about 200' to seal the doors, we moved on to the rest of the car.  that ugly spoiler need to be wrapped.  the side mirrors?  those too.  radio antenna? covered.  the coup de grĂ¢ce would have to be when we wrapped the windshield wipers together.  as a lucky break for us, the dew from the fog was causing the saran wrap to hold tighter than we had expected.  once we were satisfied that it would take him at least three hours to undo our thirty minutes of work, we had to find a way to leave the scene unnoticed.  ducking down between the rows of cars, we ninja moved our way back inside.  we took the long way, entering the building from the opposite side of the parking lot.  we played it cool, the person at the front desk didn't suspect a thing.  our mission had been successful.  now to bask in the glorious aftermath that was to follow.

"did you see that guy's car?"  "wow, some one fucked that thing up good."  "dude, they even wrapped up the wiper blades."  the praises of our act could be heard echoing the halls for weeks to come.  we had become anonymous legends.  we heard second hand that the guy had been absolutely irate when he saw the car in the morning.  for the next several weeks, he parked his car under a street lamp as close to the main building as possible.  eventually someone realized that some girls had done it, but only 4 people other than our selves know the whole story.  the moral of the day?  don't fuck with girls.  when we're out for revenge, we do it  right.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

guide to being a successful female gamer

just a disclaimer, i play WoW.  almost every gaming reference i make will refer back to this.

female gamers really do exist.  we are a somewhat elusive breed.  i would say a good portion of the girls who play started so they could actually spend some time with their gaming husbands or boyfriends (or girlfriends, i don't judge).  so finding a female gamer who is single is even harder.  finding a female gamer who is single and not bat shit crazy, well that's almost impossible.  my suggestion to the ladies is to use this to your advantage.  you have no idea how much shit random anonymous gamer guys are willing do for a single, sane female.  if you're not single, just be elusive about your relationship status.  if you're not sane, just learn to hide the crazy.

so the key to being successful in game does not mean that you actually have to play well if you're a girl.  guys are willing to forgive a lot of n00b mistakes, but only for girls.  try this one time.  make the exact same mistake that you have seen male gamers get reamed for, and see how nice they will be to you about it.  just make sure to use that feminine charm to act upset.  it's the weakness of the male gamer.  they don't know how to comfort upset females and will try to avoid getting to that point.  use this to your advantage.  set you're character on follow, then alt tab out and do something else.  switch back over in a few minutes.  if you're entire party is now dead because you were the healer, it's ok.  just start crying over vent and say something about how you lagged out.  then every thing is ok again.  just make sure that if you use the lag excuse, you never tell anyone about your custom built gaming computer with the world's fastest processor. you can also apply the "damsel in distress" theory here.  guys love to be the hero.  just act all sweet and lost, and you can pretty much get them to help with any quest you're on.

the other side of the coin is to play extremely well.  totally dominate at everything you do.  solo win a pvp battle, have twice as much dsp than any one else in your raid, be the whole reason why the lych king is now dead.  if you can play well, your appeal to the guys in game increases ten fold.  use this to your advantage.  there is a good chance that you will be able to bump equally good players out of raid spots, get invited back to do more raids, get into good pvp or instance groups, etc.  if you actually want to gear up, this is the way to go.

the other way to be successful is the "loot without raiding" method.  i am actually really good at this one.  as long as you know how to mildly flirt, you're golden.  find some lonely gamer guy, and start chatting him up.  a lot of gamer guys are desperate for female attention and are way too introverted to actually go out and find some.  use this to your advantage.  once you get him interested in talking with you, get him thinking with the little head, and not the big one.  the big head will tell him "don't listen to the skank, she's out to take you for all you have."  the little head on the other hand will be screaming "OMG!  GIVE HER WHATEVER SHE WANTS SO SHE KEEPS TALKING TO ME!"  luckily, most of these guys haven't been with a girl in years so it does not take much to get the attention of the little head.  in most cases a "hi ;)" will suffice.  if you want, start talking about how awesome his game stats are.  stroke the ego a little.  then go in for the kill.  mention how you really, really want to get the little bambi deer reward after getting 75 companion pets, and pout about how you still need 30 more.  next thing you know, that little vampire bat from the argent tournament turns up in your mail box*.  keep in mind that he had to put in a minimum of 10 days of playing to get this pet.  this also works well for getting gold, herbs, gems, ore, crafted items, and pretty much anything else you will ever need.  if you're really bold (or really desperate for in game items), send him a pic of "you." doesn't have to really be you, just some hot girl that could be you.  just make sure if you aren't using real pics, that it's believable.  no victoria's secret models.  chance are, the little head already knows those women and won't fall for it.

my final advice?  roll horde.  way more guys play horde.

*this is a real life experience. i had a boyfriend at this time, and the in game guy knew it.  this just shows you how pro i am.  and i really did get the bat pet.  the situation on my side of the computer kinda went down like this:
bf: who's that guy following you?
me: oh, just some guy in my guild
bf: why does he keep talking to you?
me: i don't know,probably because i'm awesome
bf: why is he giving you pets?
me: *crickets*
bf: are you whoring yourself in game?
me: (silence) (thinks over answer) ......... no?
bf: whatever.  you better be getting epics out of it


Monday, October 11, 2010

why great sunday nights make awful monday mornings

so i went to karaoke last night.  its a blessing and a curse to go with alex.  he's awesome to hang out with, and he will sing (certain) songs with me, but unfortunately people don't seem to comprehend that a girl can go to a bar with a guy and not be romantically involved with him.  kind of hinders my chances of talking some random guy into paying for my drinks.  and yes, i am one of those girls who will accept the drinks and then go on my merry way with out the drunk guy in tow.  i'm ok with that.  the other downside is that for some crazy reason alex (who is straight) gets more guy attention than i do.  at one point i think there were 3 guys trying to dance with him, and only 1 guy trying to dance with me.  i also ran into the one guy i know who can actually be called a rock star: tyler hole, the guitarist from  motograter .  i work with his mom.  go figure.  and no, he does not wear the make up when he goes out.

so seeing as how we were at karaoke, we of course had to sing.  i am by no means a good singer, but i won't make your ears bleed either (and trust me, there are plenty of people like that who go).  i also just make sure that i pick songs that people will like no matter how badly you sing them.  first up was "save a horse, ride a cowboy" by big & rich.   i went solo for this one.  i wanted to do californication, but alex vetoed that.  later alex and i did a repeat performance of our previous karaoke hit, "friends in low places" by garth brooks.  keep in mind that we do not do this at a country bar.  but every one loves it.  i mean, it's a song about a bar, how could anyone there not love it?

the one saving grace was that i didn't have very much money last night, so i only got two drinks.  at least this  meant that there was no possible way i would be hung over.  one was supposed to be a vodka sour, but it wasn't very good.  don't really know if the guy knew what he was making.  i have no clue what the second drink was.  i pretty much went up to the bar, told the guy i had $4 left, and to make me something with vodka in it.  it was surprisingly pretty good.  i know he mixed 4 different things in it, but all i could see from my place at the bar was vodka and peach schnapps. the rest will forever remain a mystery.  so that pretty much concludes sunday night, which technically ended at about 1 a.m. monday morning.  which of course means that after washing my face, brushing my teeth, and taking care of my other girly hygiene habits, i did't actually fall asleep until close to 2:30.

which leads to the awful part.

having to wake up at 7:00 a.m. for work at 8:00 a.m. for a job that requires you to be fully functional and alert.  don't think i really need to elaborate on that any more.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

how to make a blood elf, part 1

so blizzcon is Oct 22-23.  this is my first year going.  what does this mean to everyone else?  expect to see a lot of my gamer side in the next 2 weeks.  so being the good WoW nerd that i am, i'm dressing up as one of my characters.  a blood elf death knight to be exact.  this turned out to be way more involved than i every thought it would be.

reference pic for all you non gamers
so the clothes part wasn't too hard since i'm a huge ren faire junkie and was able to use some items i already had.  all i needed to buy was a shirt, and i'm making a creative decision (i.e. no money) to not have spaulders.  a really important part for me was to have the blood elf ears.  now i didn't think this would be a problem since halloween is right around the corner, but apparently it's really, really hard to find 6" ear extensions.  and due to cost and time, buying them on line really wasn't an option.  so after going to 2 costumes stores with out any luck, i went to costume capers.  while they didn't have the ears there, i was lucky enough to have an associate helping me who had actually worked at blizzcon last year and knew exactly what i was talking about.  so being an awesome person, he showed me how it would be possible to build my own ears.  so here's a rough how to (part 1 since i'm not finished yet) on how to make elf ears at home for under $20.

first off, you need to buy some liquid latex and floral wire.  i got a 2 oz bottle of the latex to start with, which should be fine depending on how long you want your ears.  this cost about $8.  i also got 26 GA  1/4 lb silver florist wire.  it's about $2 and you get way more than you will ever need.

next you need to make a frame.  this helps keep the ears upright, and since flora wire is extremely flexible, it will also allow you to shape the ears after they are attached to your own ears.  remember to make 2 frames.

Cross wire the frame for extra support

against my ear so you can kinda see what i'm going for



now you're ready to start painting the latex.  you need a flat glass surface to do this on.  since i didn't want to go buy a piece of glass, i used my mirror.  it works fine, but if you have access to a horizontal glass surface, i would recommend using that.  you'll want to trace an outline just to make it easier.  i used a dry erase marker, which will wash off the glass and the latex really easily



 you're going to be painting on four ears (two sides for each ear).  you can do these one at a time or all at once.  this is why the stencil helps.  that way they are all the same size.  just remember to flip 2 of them so the tops line up with the bottoms.



you're going to need to do at least 5 layers of latex for each side of each ear.  this will give you very thin ears.  you can use more latex if you want thicker ears, but just remember this will add more weight to what the frame needs to hold.  you want each layer to be totally dry before you paint on a new one.  the best way to do this is with a heat fixing gun.  or you can cheat like i did.

just make sure you have the setting on low

after you have the ears the thickness that you want, i suggest adding the frames on.  this way it dries into the latex and just makes it easier to work with later on.


now let them sit overnight.  leave them on the glass.  seriously.  do not take them off too early or you will fuck up everything you just did.  trust me on this one.  first ear i made i got impatient and pulled off early.  liquid latex is really, really sticky.  it likes to stick to itself.  when i pulled of the first ear, i didn't have the frame on it, it wasn't as dry as i thought, and it literally crumpled onto itself.  save your self the heartbreak.

after you have let the ears set over night, you can take them off the mirror.  i recommend pulling from the top down.  this was the easiest way to do it.


now you need to add the two sides of the ears together.  the latex will still be really sticky, so no need for extra glue or anything.  i pressed the two layers together along the top part of the ear.  i left the two flaps at the bottom unattached.  these will be what you use to attach the tip to your own ear.  i stored the ears with a piece if paper towel in between the bottom flaps so that they didn't stick together.


this is what your somewhat finished product will look like.  i'm going to let them sit over night, and then clean them up and trim the edges tomorrow.  then i'm going to use the rest of the liquid latex to add ridges along the edges of the ears (another nice thing about cross wiring the frame is that it already looks like the ear has inner ridges).   after that has dried. i'm going to paint them to my skin tone.  these will be in my part 2 post.


i almost have long ears now
for part 2, click here